QUESTION: My son has just turned eight years old but he will only be Grade 1 this school-year because he flunked almost all his subjects in regular school. His teacher said he can’t seem to learn the lessons even if the topics had been discussed several times already. She said that my child has learning disabilities and emotional problems so I should enroll him in a special school so he can be given more attention. It’s the first time I heard about those problems and if there were, where can I bring my child for proper assessment? Also, if this is the case, is there really a need to enroll him in a SpEd school? I’m afraid that my child will be labeled for life if I do that.”

Early and accurate identification of disability is necessary prior to any educational or therapeutic intervention. If we do not recognize that the child needs help, then help will not be given when it is due, particularly when the child’s behavior, style and pace of learning do not meet “normal” expectations and cause an impairment in functioning at home as well as in school. Consequently, the child is deprived of the opportunity to learn even if he is capable of learning with the use of appropriate teaching strategies suitable to his unique learning needs.

The end-goal of seeking for an assessment is for the child to receive the best care and help possible to address his individual needs at the soonest possible time.

Waiting for the child to outgrow his learning and behavioral problems often exposes the child to what we call the “secondary wounds of disability.” These would include the blows to his self-esteem from being called names by teachers and other adults, or being teased by classmates and peers because of his limitations. He may not have been officially diagnosed with a disability, but such negative perceptions of himself brought about by a hostile environment can affect his self-esteem and willingness to believe the best in himself.

THE ISSUE OF LABELING

A comprehensive assessment done by competent professionals can determine the child’s strengths and weaknesses in the context of the “whole” child, the focus being on finding areas of potential rather than lack. He may not learn in the same way as other children, but he most definitely would have capabilities that could be optimized instead of his limitations always being highlighted, particularly in school. The question is not “What is wrong with him?” Rather, it is “How could we help him?”

Seeking for an assessment is not meant to label children as being “special” and discriminate against them. Beyond determining the diagnosis clinically which can only be done after a thorough evaluation of the child in different contexts including his natural environment which is the home and school, an assessment would serve as the basis for planning out the child’s educational program.

Only then could strategies, interventions, and school placement decisions (such as whether or not he should go to a regular or a special school) suited to his specific needs be recommended.

In cases wherein the child’s learning and development are impaired as evidenced by poor academic performance and social skills deficits resulting to difficulties in establishing healthy relationships with peers and adults, the issue of labeling becomes secondary. Whether or not he is “labeled” as a result of an assessment, the issues and concerns remain unless help is given in the form of appropriate educational programming and therapeutic intervention. Sadly, people around him could have already “labeled” him with their own negative perceptions and intolerance for diversity.

SEEKING FOR AN ASSESSMENT

An assessment for diagnostic purposes could be sought from neurodevelopmental pediatricians, psychiatrists, clinical psychologists, and sped diagnosticians. Most often than not, for children who are already going to school, the referral for consultation with these professionals would come from the school’s guidance counselor or from the school’s directress/principal.

On the part of the school, it takes a lot of sensitivity, understanding, objectivity and sincerity to report observations of the child that could lead to the referral. Denial from parents should be expected, and should not be personally taken against them. Being told that your child needs help or may be “special” is like being “sentenced” to parenting a child with a disability, as parents would often say. However, such grief brought about by the realization that there might be “something different” with your child that warrants special attention should be replaced by proactively seeking for ways to help your child. This is the time when schools should provide parents with the necessary support to help them thru a critical time of doubt and confusion. They could refer them to competent professionals who can conduct a thorough evaluation of the child’s needs, strengths and limitations in order to come up with appropriate and feasible recommendations.

CHOOSING YOUR BATTLES

As parents, there are many tough decisions that you have to make. Deciding to take the first step by seeking for an assessment is only the beginning of the road for parents like you, wanting only what is best for your child. You want to protect your son from cruelty, ridicule and judgment, but as a loving parent, you have to choose your battles. The best armor you have that you could impart to your son is making him believe in himself no matter what the world says about him. Regardless of the negativity and intolerance that surrounds us, you just have to believe and hope in your child, and make sure he would grow up believing in himself and what he CAN do, not what he CANNOT.