10. TEACH YOUR CHILD THE PROPER USE OF TV, VIDEO GAMES AND COMPUTERS. Psychiatrist Matthew Dumont suggests that hyperkinetic syndrome is related to the constant shifting of visual frames in television shows. The incessant changes of camera and focus cause the viewer’s reference point to shift every few seconds. This technique literally programs the short attention span of a hyperactive child, attempting to recapture the dynamic quality of the television screen by rapidly changing his perceptual orientation.

Parents need not completely prohibit television viewing and video games for their hyperactive children for the following reasons:

Television viewing is a satisfying activity when taken in measured doses.
Television and video games connect children to society. Depriving your children of this puts them at a disadvantage when they go to school or play with friends and hear them discuss shows or games your children have never seen.
Research suggests that children labeled “hyperactive” seem to have the ability to divide their attention
between television viewing and other activities around them, without having their comprehension of either stimulus negatively affected.
Proper supervision can lead to increased abilities in a number of visual-spatial and critical thinking skills, including the understanding of plots, characterizations, and how individual scenes relate to the whole.

11. TEACH YOUR CHILD TO HAVE POSITIVE CAREER GOALS. Children may find their true place in life only when they get out into the real world and discover a vocation that allows them to do what they do best.

In order to ensure that they find their true vocation, however, we parents should begin stimulating their career aspirations from an early age. That does not mean pushing them into a job description that matches our idea, as parents, of what they should do. Rather, it means letting them know that the traits they possess are valuable in the workplace.

We can help stimulate career aspirations in our children by exposing them to a wide range of these and other high-variety, high-movement vocations through trips to the library and exposure to vocation-oriented movies and television programs.

From time to time, let us ask our children what they would like to be when they grow up. Let us, for example, suggest that they draw a picture of what they see themselves doing 25 years from now. Then, Let’s talk about their aspirations and take their comments seriously. We should try not to discourage them if they seem to want to take up a vocation we consider unsuitable or unrealistic.

12. TEACH YOUR CHILD POSITIVE-TALK. Over the past few years, cognitive psychologists have encouraged children and adults to engage in “self-talk”.

Self-talk represents a process whereby an individual develops key phrases that can guide him through a complex task or difficult situation.

Self-talk has proven quite useful in helping children with attention and behavior problems to develop self-control and reflection skills. For one, it can be employed as a means to control anger.

Self –talk can also be used to help children organize themselves. If you want your child to clean up his room, for example, the question “Now, let’s see, where do I begin?” could prompt him to initiate a coordinated set of actions, and might be followed by “Okay, that’s done. What do I do next?”

This process of internalizing language is seen as a key to helping children develop self-control strategies. Let your children develop their own phrases (after you give some examples) rather than have them use the ones you give them. These unique expressions of their own personalities are more likely to be remembered than externally imposed phrases.

Finally, have fun doing this with them!

(The author Henry S. Tenedero is the president of the Center for Learning and Teaching Styles, an affiliate of the International Learning Styles Network, based at St. John’s University in New York. He is a graduate of the AIM Masters in Development management and of the Harvard Graduate School for Professional Educators. He is the author of the following books: Cooking Up A Creative Genius; The HI CLASS Teacher, Breakthrough Ideas in Education; and Using Passion and Laughter in Your Presentations. He can be reached at htenedero@yahoo.com)