Tough luck for Chavit Singson. This is a matriarchal society. His boss is a lady. Women run the media. The most active, the loudest sector of activists is dominated by no-longer-the-weaker-sex. For his sake, the RTC judge trying his case is hopefully neither a feminist nor a feminist-at-heart.

All legal, moral and ethical considerations aside, the tragedy of Che – Rachel Tiongson – is that she left the conjugal home (whether she and Chavit are a legally wedded couple is not the point here) when she was its queen, empress and duchess for 17 luxurious, if not 100 percent lovable and loving years. And all for what?

Her children are enrolled in the most expensive school (matriculation payable only in pound sterling).

For what amounted to one-half of her lifetime, she ruled his heart, his home and castle in a prime subdivision. She traveled first class with or without him, every vacation cum shopping expedition a fantasy other women her age would kill for. He worshipped her, offering at her feet jewels of the highest quality, the most internationally advertised brands. At a dinner-show just weeks before their breakup two years ago, he paid for a set of sparklers that could have built a row of schoolhouses for poor children. As lifestyle writers looked on in awe, he whipped out his checkbook, signed his name, and was rewarded with a sweet, contented smile on her smooth-skinned, blushing face.

For all the usual reasons wives leave their husbands or paramours – infidelity, vices, sloth, cruelty, stinginess (the no. 1 cause, in Chitang Nakpil’s book) – there was no such complaint heard from Che. If she was the long-suffering wife or mistress or common-law wife (as the case may be), Manila’s gossip-happy sororities and fraternities were not aware. Maybe Che was a good actress?

As the writer of an etiquette book for mistresses, I am often asked what I advise wives whose husbands they suspect of keeping an “other woman.” My advice: “Unless he’s manhandling you or dying to kill you, pretend you don’t know or you don’t care, but don’t leave the conjugal abode. Let him suffer while you stay comfy.”