DEAR CHICO AND DELAMAR...By the time you get this, the elections are probably over. But I can’t say the same for the political situation in our home.

My parents and I are on opposite sides of the political fence. Throughout the campaign period, I have expressed support for a candidate that hasn’t really made an impression in the surveys, while my parents are staunch supporters of one of the leading contenders.

This has caused a lot of arguments between me and them, which often get heated. They tell me that I am wasting my vote by casting it for someone who will “surely lose”, and that I should vote for their candidate instead, which they feel will help him fare better than his fiercest rival. Things got especially heated a couple of days ago, and the three of us still aren’t talking with each other.

Am I making the right decision by standing by my candidate, no matter if he’ll probably lose? Is my vote really wasted on him? I just hope that whoever wins, they do right by the country. - Joanne

CHICO SAYS...Voting for a candidate is your inalienable right as a human being. No matter what your reasons are, however well-informed or ignorant, there is no “wrong” or “right” vote. You have the right to vote for who you think is best for the job. Even if you voted just because everybody else is voting that way, it’s still your right. Even if you voted for the “wrong” person, it’s still your right. That’s what democracy is all about.

Besides, you’d have to live with your decision and feel the aftershocks once whoever is elected is in power. This is very much like another touchy topic for many families: religion. If you believe in a faith that everyone else disagrees with, do you have a right to go against everybody else? Of course. Even if they believe that you’re just wasting your vote, that’s their opinion.

They have a right to voice this opinion, but in the same vein, you have a right to have your own dissenting opinion as well. If they have a right to vote for their candidate, then you have a right to vote for yours. The privilege is absolutely equal.

That said, is going against everybody in your family worth this vote? Only you can answer that. All I’m saying is, you have the right to stand up for what you truly believe in. But deciding to keep the piece is something that you will have to decide on.

Again I overflow with copious “air quotes” when it comes to the words “right” and “wrong” because they’re so subjective and relative that what is wrong to one person may be right to another.

What I value in collective units like families or barkadas is the concept of “agreeing to disagree”.

Obviously we all can’t have the same opinions about EVERYTHING all the time. There will be causes, beliefs, situations, wherein people who are very close to each other will have opposing views.

Does that mean you love each other any less? Not necessarily. Of course I say this in general terms.

Obviously there are extreme cases. For example, if one believes in mass murder as a means to worship demons in hell, it might transcend the concept of “agreeing to disagree” because it already involves criminal acts and are subject to the rules of law.

But in general, people should be able to civilly disagree without coming to blows, or without families falling apart. Just because you’re voting for a different candidate, does that mean you’re any less of a daughter or a sister? A resounding NO! I do hope you and your family can transcend the fiery emotions and remember that your love for each other is still bigger than Philippine politics. Our presidents change every 6 years, but family?

That’s for life.

(Chico and Delle welcome your letters.

Write to: youth@mb.com.ph or fax through 527-7511. Listen to the Dynamic Duo Monday to Saturday, 6 a.m. to 9 a.m. over Monster Radio RX 93.1)