Scam mail hacked President P-Noy’s mobile phone. Two safety rules:

Rule No. 1: Do not text while driving.
Rule No. 2: Do not text while President-ing.

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Centro Escolar University swept eight of the top 10 places in the Board of Optometry licensure exam. CEU scores with 20-20 vision!

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President P-Noy blew his top at misdirected trajectory of typhoon Basyang with untold loss in life and property; PAGASA pleads poor equipment as excuse.

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Senator Loren Legarda filed Senate Bill 1406, the PAGASA Modernization Act 2010. This provides a P5-billion fund for necessary high-tech equipment, but none for salary increases.

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Hold your horses! Didn’t PAGASA plot with pin-point accuracy the path of “Ondoy” and “Pepeng”?

How cum their equipment is all of a sudden depreciated?!

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Can we believe the rib of Anthony Taberna of Dos por Dos, that two of our best meteorologists are vacationing Down Under and looking for greener pastures?

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If this is true, por Dios por Santo, the solution is to bring our experts back and keep them happy here with commensurate wages and incentives. Not only is it the right thing to do by our professionals... it is also cheaper than buying P5-billion worth of high-tech toys.

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BTW, we should also do right by our topnotch but underpaid air controllers... before we lose them to Malaysia and Singapore.

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AN IDEA WHOSE TIME HAS COME. There’s supposed to be a general increase in government wages. DFA foreign service personnel are getting graduated increase to double their salaries by 2011.

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LOVE THY NEIGHBOR. We are so close to our northern neighbor that we share typhoons... which RP exports to Taiwan.

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In enlightened self-interest, Taipei Economic and Cultural Office (TECO) Rep. Donald Lee turned over on February 18 this year to DoST Secretary Alabastro 15 automatic weather stations worth P13 million. Taiwan will also train PAGASA staff to predict and monitor typhoons.

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PRESIDENTIAL RUSSIAN ROULETTE. P-Noy threatens to slice Congress pork barrel. To lead by example, he may give up his own pork barrel by privatizing Pagcor.

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Don’t do it, Mr. President! If you cut off pork barrel, Congress won’t support Belmonte for Speaker... and Pagcor spells Presidential PORC for short.

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Anti-gambling cleric Lingayen Bishop Oscar Cruz’s nightmare is that Stanley Ho hits the jackpot by scooping up Pagcor.

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TRAVEL. Because of example set by P-Noy and the Presidential sisters, for the first time in their lives, Congressman GMA, Atty. Mike Arroyo, and Rep. Dato Arroyo were spotted queueing at the PAL counter for their flight to Hong Kong.

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MEMORABILIA. The apparently endless market for images of Marilyn Monroe now extends to inside the bombshell’s body. A set of three Monroe chest X-rays from a 1954 hospital visit sold for $45,000 at the Hollywood Legends auction at Planet Hollywood Resort and Casino in Las Vegas.

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Buyer didn’t know that X-ray’s don’t get the same view as Superman’s x-ray vision.

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Italian luxury car maker Maserati S.p.A. entered RP market expecting to sell 10 to 20 units this year. Maserati is distributed by Formula Sports Inc (FSI), the distributor of Jaguar, Land Rover, and soon Ferrari.

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Now I know why we build all those NLEX, SLEX, and STAR toll. Feedback: jaz@mb.com.ph