MANILA, Philippines – DEAR CHICO AND DELAMAR...I’m a high school senior and modesty aside, I have been told countless times before that I am attractive. A lot of the guys in school have been sending feelers my way, but none of them have really caught my interest.

The reason for that – and the reason for this letter as well – is because I think I am in love with my math teacher. He’s a recent college graduate and while he isn’t the best-looking guy around, I love how smart and funny he is. And I think he feels the same way, because my friends tell me that he treats me different from all the other students in class.

I now you’re probably going to tell me that this is just a school girl crush, but I really think that the two of us have a future together. I know that he will never be the one to approach me, so I am thinking of making the first move myself. What do you guys think? Do I have a chance? Or am I just being crazy and seeing something that isn’t really there? – Minnie

CHICO SAYS…I don’t question your feelings for your teacher. What I do question is the timing.

There are VER Y good reasons why relationships between teacher-student are discouraged. Mainly because it’s disadvantageous to everyone concerned. The teacher’s objectivity will automatically come into question as far as grading you is concerned. The teacher is supposed to be the arbiter between his students. So what happens when, let’s say, you get into an argument with a classmate? Can his judgment be trusted? Will his final say be trusted knowing one party is his girlfriend? These are the same reasons why boss-employee hook-ups are also frowned upon. Plus there are just ethical issues raised by such relationships.

If this love is real, it can wait until the time is ripe. Is there really a need to rush things? I don’t want to bring out the “too young” card, but you are in high school, and there’s enough time to nurture this budding love, if ever. Wait until a time when you and this guy could explore whatever it is the future holds for you both, minus all the drama. But until then, maybe it’s prudent to maintain the status quo. Maybe the reason he’s not making a move is precisely because it compromises his delicate position.

Maybe you should follow his lead. Trust me, if a guy is interested in you, he will find a way to profess it. My suggestion, wait until after he is no longer your teacher. That way you can pursue whatever relationship you want to explore. It’s not like you have a biological clock banging against your uterus door at your age, so it’s perfectly fine to shift down a gear or two and take your time.

DELAMAR SAYS…Whether your math teacher likes you or not is not the most important question right now. Look, the only way to find out if he has feelings for you or not is to make the first move yourself if, as you said he won’t even make the first move and that you’re fine with making it. The reason he won’t make the first move aside from what you might think is just normal garden variety kind of being ‘torpe’ is really because he SHOULDN’T. He is, after all, a teacher. You’re a student. This type of relationship is not allowed for as long as he is a teacher and you are a student in the same school. Propriety does not allow it.

His every judgment will be questioned, even if he is not directly your teacher. For as long as he is part of the faculty and you are part of the student body, preferential treatment will always be suspected.

Even if not him directly to you, other teachers might be suspected of treating you better precisely because you are a co-teacher’s girlfriend. This will only open up a whole can of worms if he does (and we don’t know that yet, ok?) have feelings for you. Your individual positions at this point in your lives, him being the teacher and you being a student, is not conducive to a proper start of a relationship.

We don’t know with certainty and for a fact that this math teacher likes you. But again this is not the most important question right now. The most important question right now is for you to just focus on graduating high school. Your positions being what they are, can’t really give you an honest chance at finding out if there can really be something real between you romantically.

So, my advice is, and I know you will not like this but here it is anyway — WAIT TILL AFTER YOU GRADUATE TO DO ANY MOVE ON YOUR MATH TEACHER. After you graduate and after the teacher-student relationship is officially over, you can start making your move on him. By then you will really know if he does have some feelings for you or not. He won’t be bound by any rule and you can freely do what you want. Just keep the communication alive with him but keep it non-romantic for now and then when the TIME IS RIGHT you can do what your heart desires.

What’s a few more months of waiting, right? School year is almost half way done anyway. You only have a little over a year to wait. In the meantime, just focus on your studies since that is the most important thing really that you have to work on.

Love will and can wait. There is no real hurry. And believe me, if it IS true love then waiting for a more proper time for it to blossom is not at all that hard. Just wait. When the ink on your diploma is dried then your quest of finding out if he does like you or not can really begin. Until then, just learn to wait because the situation right now for both of you prohibits any kind of real chance…if any.

(Chico and Delle welcome your letters. Write to: youth@mb.com.ph or fax through 527-7511. Listen to the Dynamic Duo Monday to Saturday, 6 a.m. to 9 a.m. over Monster Radio RX 93.1)