MANILA, Philippines — Dear Chico and Delamar...I met Adam in second year high school. We’re college seniors now, and we know each other so well that some of our friends joke that we’re practically a married couple. That joke didn’t really bother me until recently.

See, before last month, Adam and I did everything together. We eat, go to the gym, look for girls in bars together. Picking up girls is rarely successful, though, as the two of us always end up going back to our dorms with each other anyway. I don’t know if we’re intentionally cockblocking each other or not. We fight like boyfriend and girlfriend, and we usually patch things up by play fighting and wrestling with each other.

It was during one of these sessions of making up that we ended up...making out. While our clothes remained on, it got really intense. This was my first time making out with a guy and I have to say that I liked it. We haven’t talked about it since then, but we do often find each other having these long staring contests and just grinning these big grins at each other for no reason.

I’ve always thought of myself as straight, and I still do because Adam is the only guy I’m attracted to, but that’s not really my problem. My problem is the fact that I want to make out with him again and I don’t know if I should just go for it. Are our staredowns enough of a go signal? Should the two of us have a talk? Or do I just initiate a make-out session when it presents itself? -Steve

Chico says...If it were just a matter of letting off steam, I’d probably advise you to let your “wrestling” do the talking. But if it were more than just your average teenage sexual experimentation, I’d suggest you have a good man-to-man (no pun intended) talk.

But the fact that you reached the point that you wrote us a letter meant the matter bears down on you heavier than you expected. So I suggest you find relief not just in the physical way, but also in the emotional.

You seem befuddled about your sexuality. You say you think you’re still straight since Adam is the only other man you’re attracted to. Maybe that is the case, that you are bisexual in the way that you are attracted to girls plus one man. But it could also mean that you are gay, but Adam is the first guy to open up that rainbow door. Maybe once you explore your feelings about him more, you’d see that you ARE attracted to guys after all.

I’m neither encouraging you to be strictly heterosexual nor homosexual, since sexuality is mostly fluid, but all I’m saying is you need to know if you’re really mostly straight or if you’re only straight because you haven’t allowed yourself to be gay. The fact that you have staring matches seems to me that there’s more brewing underneath than you both care to reveal.

True, it could just be a stage, that once you’re done with your experimentation, you go back to being exclusively straight, but it could also mean you’re a latent homosexual and only coming to terms with it now.

It’s all good if you’re both one or both the other. It might be a little bit messier if you’re one of each, because it might spell heartbreak for the other. But this really is treading in waters that are way far off in the distance.

It’s pointless to talk about swimming if you’re not even sure if you’re going to the beach.

I just suggest you guys talk it out, whatever the case may be, so that you might figure out what all “this” is all about. For all you know, you’re just two guys who need to let off steam, and with the absence of females, have found an alternative way to release some tension. But in case it’s actually more than that, it might help to deal with exploring this new territory with honesty and candor.

Delamar says...Just like the first encounter where you just stumbled into a make-out session, why don’t you just feel it out? Lots of what makes for chemistry is that you can just feel when the time is right. You will know and he will know.

I suppose what is probably happening is that you are both surprised at the idea that you are both attracted to each other. It sounds a lot like you both didn’t have an idea nor the inkling that you were both attracted to the same sex. That in itself might be reason why neither is initiating a second make-out session – for fear that you both don’t want to be the first one to make a move because that might mean you are the gay one. Maybe that’s why you are both having these staredowns.

My advice is if your relationship is one that is open and you talk about everything, then by all means talk about what happened. But if it isn’t and you are more comfortable with just feeling things out, then feel them out. Send a signal that you want to get physical again and see how he reacts to it. A touch might also do the trick. See how he responds to it. If he isn’t afraid to be alone with you after what happened then it might mean that he is also interested in making out with you a second time. See how you both react to each other’s company.

If there is an awkwardness about it or if there is a reluctance to be alone with each other, then that might mean there won’t be a second make-out session. But if you find that you are spending as much time with each other and there is no bad vibe between you, just an uncertain feel to things then I would read that as you both are just waiting for the other one to make the first move.

The only question is will you be the one to initiate the making out this time?

(Chico and Delle welcome your letters. Write to: youth@mb.com.ph or fax through 527-7511. Listen to the Dynamic Duo Monday to Saturday, 6 a.m. to 9 a.m. over Monster Radio RX 93.1)