DEAR CHICO, DELAMAR, AND GINO... It will be my boyfriend and I’s fourth anniversary this coming Valentine’s, and we've had a really great four years so far.

If there's been a fly in the ointment, it's the fact that my boyfriend has recently taken up smoking. I'm fairly certain it's a new habit because I wouldn't have agreed to be his girlfriend in the first place if I knew about it.

What's worse is that he constantly denies that he's smoking too much when the evidence is plain to see. I see it in his bag squeezed among his school books. When we're on dates, he frequently excuses himself and comes back smelling obviously of cigarettes. He insists that I'm overreacting.

Aside from being bad for his health, I think he's a little too young to pick up this habit.  We're only just starting college next year! I don't want to break up with him, but I don't want him to continue smoking either. What can you guys suggest I do? - Julie

CHICO SAYS ...You might've heard of the saying, “Women marry men hoping they'll change, but they never do. Men marry women hoping they'll never change, but they always do.” It may seem humorous, but there are slivers of truth marbled between the humor. I actually know many people who successfully quit smoking, doing it for different reasons. For some, it’s because they got together with non-smokers. Others do when they gave birth to a child, and some by decree of their doctors.

Your boyfriend could be one of those people, but be ready for the possibility that he could be one of those lifelong smokers as well. And yes, I know an equal amount lot of those as well. When a relationship is like a complex fraction, reduce it to its lowest terms. In the end, it boils down to either you or your boyfriend giving in to the other. Either he gives in to you and quits smoking, or he refuses to quit and you just learn to accept that part of him. If a stand-off ensues, then you'll simply part ways. Stick around long enough to see if you can make him quit. If you can, then good for you. If you can't, then you decide if you're staying or leaving smoke-free.

DELAMAR SAYS... Well, smoking is a physical addiction. His body craves nicotine. Yes, there are people who have strong-willed their way out of this bad habit but that's just it — he needs to want to kick the habit. At the moment your boyfriend doesn't seem to want to. Yes, it is dangerous to his health. But he is a male teenager. He's going to want to assert himself and try new and ‘adult’ things. Maybe it's a phase that he'll outgrow eventually. But then again, maybe it's the start of a lifelong addiction that will endanger his life. Right now though, you don't know where it will lead to. This is his call, obviously. It will be up to him if wants to kick the habit or not. All evidence point to that not happening soon.

Is this enough to break up with your boyfriend? Only you can answer that. For some people it is a real deal breaker. You have to decide if you are one of those people. Are you the girl who would break up with a bf who smokes or are you the girlfriend who will help her bf kick the habit? I think you should try to help him kick the habit. You may fail, you may succeed.

But you have to try harder for someone you love whose only catch at the moment is this bad habit. Don't you think?

GINO SAYS...I understand where you're coming from but the thing is if you love your boyfriend you'll have to accept him for who he is, including his vices (new or old). If this totally conflicts with what you want in a guy, then just let him know. But one of the reasons he probably denies it is because you don't allow him to. He's old enough to make his own decisions. I'm sure he knows the repercussions of smoking and all but if it’s something he wants to do, then you shouldn't tell him otherwise. Either accept him, or don't be with him.

Who knows? He might eventually quit if you let him since the thrill of doing something illegal is taken out. Honestly though, I wouldn't make it such a big deal now since he's growing up and probably experimenting and all.

(Chico, Delle, and Gino welcome your letters. Write to: MByouthsection@gmail.com or the Students and Campuses Facebook Fanpage. Listen to the Kikay Barkada Monday to Saturday, 6 a.m. to 10 a.m. over Monster Radio RX 93.1)