I was just a year removed from college when you left us.  Yeyet was on her 2nd year of college, Darrell and Gabby were but little boys.  I know I promised you that I would help Tatay take care of my younger siblings.

On your 61st birthday, I am happy to report that we are all ok.

Yeyet, though an undergrad, has a small internet and gaming café and is into all sorts of “sidelines”.  I guess she inherited your penchant for “sidelines”.  I remember you were into tutoring, small-time publishing of freshman English textbooks, malasugi fish retailing, and even “ukay-ukay” aside from your regular teaching job.  Yeyet is now married and has a 3-year old daughter named E-she.  It is E-she and the one-hectare farm bought with his retirement money that now keeps Tatay busy in Davao.

Darrell is a thesis shy of his MS in Chemistry.  He wants to be a scientist and has a girlfriend who is also an aspiring scientist.  They’re still young, they have a long way to go, and I hope they realize their dreams together.  Darrell rents an apartment in Mandaluyong and visits me in Divisoria at least twice a month.  In fact he’s the favorite tito of my 3 kids and my eldest says he wants to be a scientist like his tito.

Nay, though I’ve missed your guidance all these years, I can say that I’ve also been doing well.

I stumbled into programming in 1994 and it has provided for my needs ever since.  I’ve worked in the best companies, been to Australia and Singapore, and worked with some of the best IT minds all because of programming.

When my very first program revision was implemented into production back in 1994, my teammates literally fell out of their chairs laughing when I exclaimed, “Nay, marunong na akong mag-program!”  Of course I laughed along with them.  Little did they know that I truly dedicated that program especially for you, my number 1 fan.

Programming also got me in touch with my wife.  Thess was a classmate in COBOL programming.  Until now she denies that she made the first move.  I know you’ll believe me when I say she was definitely the one who made the first move.

Our first “date” came about because she kept on bugging me to treat her to a “blow-out” with my first bonus.  We had a heavy merienda cum light dinner in Glorietta and then I accompanied her home.  After that I felt obligated to call her every day and offer to bring her home.  A few months of this was all I could take so I had to pop the eternal question, “Is this where you live?”  She said yes and you can just imagine my surprise when the next day I received a little note from her stating that her yes was definitely a YES.

All of a sudden your torpe son had a girlfriend.  Lesson learned: “Innocent questions often lead to fatal consequences”.

Nay, I know you’ll be proud to know that she meets all your requirements for a daughter-in-law.  Even way back in high school you always reminded me to look for someone intelligent.  For what would we talk about if she was lacking in the brains department was your constant theme.

Thess is not only a high school valedictorian but also a cum laude graduate of UST.  I don’t know why she bristles every time I tell her I married her for her brains.  Women, they never can take compliments.

Nay, when Tatay made the traditional pamanhikan, I know he did a good job.  He was the one who suggested that we bring along pancit malabon and some fruits.  He was the one who countered every obstacle my prospective mother-in-law and sister-in-law could provide.  But I felt your charisma would have immediately won them over.  Your talent for tsika-tsika and putting strangers at ease would have won them over right on the first round.  If the Jesuits could never say no to you every time you went for another salary loan, I can’t imagine anyone being able to say no to you.

It was Tatay and Tita Sr. Wil who led me to the altar when Thess and I finally pledged to be together forever in December 1998.  How I wished it were you latched onto my other arm.

I missed you when we learned Thess was pregnant with Aaron, our first child, your first grandchild.  I called Tatay and I called every one I knew.  I wanted to call you too.  Since then we’ve had Brian and Caitlyn.  I know they would all have fallen for you and called you their favorite lola.

Nay, for every baptismal celebration, for every birthday party, we have always set aside a special place for you.  My pride and joy at these occasions is always mixed with sadness at your absence.

My wife tells me I am prone to bouts of depression and temper every time May and September comes around.  I don’t know.  I just know I miss you most during these times.  Whenever your birthday comes around every September, I wish I could hug and kiss you Happy Birthday.  I wish my kids and Yeyet’s daughter, your apos, could sing you Happy Birthday and then smother you with hugs and kisses.

Nay, I have kept my promise of helping Tatay take care of Yeyet, Darrell and Gabby.  I know they are now capable of taking care of themselves.  This time I make another promise.  I promise I’ll always be a good son.

Happy Birthday Nay - wherever you may be.  I love you and I miss you so much…

Love,

Popot

Paul Vergel, the IT Dinosaur, begs his readers’ and editor’s indulgence for this piece.  His mother died of complications from breast cancer in May 1992.  September 18 is her birth anniversary.  Comments are welcome at itdinosaur@gmail.com.