Hello there mommy!!!

What an interesting problem you’ve got there. Most of the time, it is a parent’s challenge to get their kids to be comfortable and friendly with other people aside from those he sees at home. But your boy is special I must say. Going to a new environment and not needing warm-up time before he gets comfortable is different from the usual clingy toddler. But is it really too much to get embarassed about?

I notice that adults (mostly parents because they are in the know) appreciate toddlers who are precocious and friendly. It is another thing though, if your child is rude or hurts other people. If that is the case, you need to discipline him. If he is so comfortable that he might be in danger (such as immediately jumping on the couch in your friend’s house), then there is an opportunity to correct and warn him against getting hurt. It is difficult to just sit a 2-year old beside you and expect him to be still.

It will also be difficult to reprimand him about being too comfortable (maybe instantly holding your friend’s hand or singing Jingle Bells out of the blue) when it does not pose any sort of danger to him. I suggest that you try to bring educational toys or a favorite stuffed animal with you whenever you visit a friend’s place. Keep it in your bag until you get to the new place then bring it out. At least that will keep your child busy for a few minutes and give him a different start from the usual things he does when you go to a new place.

But honestly, if you’re going to a friend or relative’s house, you shouldn’t be embarrassed if your child is too friendly. Like I said, unless he is destructive or rude, there is no need apologize. Why not channel your child’s confidence and teach him a couple of songs to sing to other people. At the age of 2, they still won’t think that you're prepping them to be the next child wonder of the Philippines. It's different when he is already 16 and you’re still asking him to do a song or a dance at family get-togethers.

If your child is in the habit of roaming around, try your best to identify parameters. Try telling him repeatedly that you will allow him to roam around but only to a point that you can still see one another. At the age of two, it might still be a challenge to get our kids to understand exactly what we are asking of them. But with repetition (and a lot of hand movements!) you might be able to get the message across.

You can also try a game with him. Tell him that he can roam around but if you say his name for example, and ask "where are you?" he has to go back and check with you.

Now if your issue is safety and you’re in a public place such as the mall, it is best to be very very attentive. Try to ignore all those glorious store window signs that say "SALE" and keep your eye on your toddler. Nothing is more amazing than being in a place that’s huge and filled with stuff. Here in the Philippines, we are usually lucky because a lot of us have nannies, lolas or titas and titos whom we go to the mall with. So we can take turns keeping a hawk’s eye on our kids.

Good luck to you mommy! Keep on watching that precocious child of yours! And if I were you, I would really make a performer out of him!!! I can almost hear my husband cringing. Merry, Merry Christmas!!!

Paolo says

I feel that a 2-year old will have some problems understanding the concept of one kind of behavior being acceptable at home and another set of "rules" when at someone else's house. The concept of a "double standard" of what is proper at home and what isn’t might still be beyond his/her comprehension at this stage and expecting our kids to automatically shift from one set of rules to another might be a tall order.

At a young age, when they are still forming thier personalities, perhaps it is best to stick to a consistent standard of what you would consider acceptable behavior to avoid confusion. After all, it is the guidance that we give them at this point that will form the basis of their character in the coming years.

So perhaps in terms of a big picture "disciplining," the first thing you have to do is decide what behavior standards you consider to be acceptable and stick to those; so your child has a clear picture of what your standards are. Our role as parents is to teach our kids "good" behavior from "bad" and a simple way to do this is to reward "good" behavior by giving your child a positive response when they behave appropriately so that they are motivated to continue behaving that way and to repeatedly give a negative response to undesirable behaviour. Do this early so its easy to change your child's behavior patterns. Good Luck!