This article is a serious message to every chatter out there, regardless of age or gender. I wanna talk to you today about safety in chatting.  No, don't roll your eyes at me. There are real, actual dangers out there. I know, it's hard to understand that you might actually be in danger if you're sitting in front of your computer, talking to people in a chat room, because you think you're anonymous.

I have news for anyone who thinks they're anonymous when they're online -- You're Not!  Once again. My few centavos worth….

Keep Your Personal Information Personal

If you chat on IRC, most networks let people get your IP address (I.P addresses are those numbers and letters that identify your general geographic location once you log on onto a server).  Using your IP address, people can then figure out which Internet provider you use -- and even what town you're calling from. Take this example of a US-based IP address:

IP Address: 38.30.206.155

Resolved Hostname: ip155.fort-myers3.fl.pub-ip.psi.net

Just from looking at the resolved hostname, I can tell that the person on this IP address right now is chatting from Fort Myers in Florida. If I were chatting with this person, and happened to find out their first name, their age, the school they went to or where they worked, I probably wouldn't have too much trouble finding them in real life, if I wanted to.  Here in the Philippines IP’s may be traced by logging on to http://www.geobytes.com/IpLocator.htm?GetLocation.  Simply type in the person’s IP number and his/her location will be disclosed.  Although not 100% accurate, this gives the person whom you’re chatting with a pretty clear idea of your general area.

Using proxy servers is effective to hide your identity but this is not an easy task for ordinary users as there are settings that need to be configured in order for it to work properly.

Keep Your Private Parts to Yourself

Yes, you heard me right!  With the breakthroughs in technology came video conferencing, SKYYPE (where all of you may be seen typing and also heard so long as you have a good sound card, mic, fast internet service provider) cyber karaoke, and of course --- a camera.  People think that because they do cam to cam conversations in the privacy of their own homes, behind closed doors, they can also freely do more intimate things on cam like “private shows” (mostly consisting of chatters “showing and telling” how they feel about each other via erotic chats, and even performing sexual acts online such as exposing one’s self or playing with one’s self in full view of your “so you thought“ lone audience).  Well, if you saw American Pie the movie, there was that scene about the geeky hero doing it for the 1st time with a gorgeous campus cutie.  And unknown to him his buds put a camera and passed on the action  via the internet and was  viewed by practically the whole school and who knows who else?  Well that could  happen in real life too! 

What a lot of people don't understand is that even the smallest bit of personal information, casually given away in the most off-hand manner, can be very dangerous. That's why it's extremely important for chatters (especially the young chatters) to follow the Rules for Safety Online,  which include:

1.      Never agree to get together with someone you meet online without first checking with parents. If your parents agree to the meeting, make sure that it is in a public place and that you either bring mom or dad or other people.

2.      Do not give out personal information such as address, telephone number,  work address/telephone number, or the name and location of your school without asking your folks if it is ok.

That's mainly for kids, of course. But what about adults? Well, we're not immuned, not by any means of the imagination. More than once, I've witnessed people give out their real first name and their phone number to someone else, in public, in front of several other chatters! These incidents could have led to someone finding out where the chatter lived. If that had happened, anything could have happened to them. They could have been physically harmed, or maybe something less painful, but more sinister -- they could have been stalked.

So many cases of rape, stalking, harassment and even robbery or theft have been attributed to “cyber meetings”.  Couple that with “texting pals” that have replaced the very 70’s phone pals premise.  What we need to remember is that every bit of information we give out can be used against us and can be used to find us. You all know my name is Jaye Bautista. Do you know where I live? If you've read my articles, you know as much as the fact that I am a mom, and that I “probably” live in Manila. Do you know how old I am? No, because I don't give out my age. I tell people I'm just a “very matured” person. That could mean between 21 or 100!. Do you know where I hang out? Who my family members and friends are? No and no. My name is now public knowledge but do you know if this is my birth name?  Bautista is such a common name that you could pretty much keep on second guessing what province or city I’m from till your face turns blue, and still not know where for sure.  But even if you have a common name, you've got to be careful about the details you give out.

Be careful. Chat safely. Trust no one. You never know who's watching.