Most couples would ask, "Why do we need to register?" I am sure you don’t want to receive gifts you don’t really like on your special day. On the other hand, your guests would also like you to appreciate, if not love, the gifts they give you.

Though, it is not obligatory for a couple to have one, a bridal registry helps ease the trouble of looking for the right gift. Treat your bridal registry as a wish list of gifts you wish to receive from your family, friends and guests. You should not insist however that guests should shop for your gift exclusively from your registry list. Remember, the gifts they give are their choice. And some presents are carefully chosen surprises that may become the most cherished gifts you’ve received.

Basically, you start with items you’ll need for your new home. Register for basic appliances, cookware, formal and casual china, crystal, flatware and bed and bath linens.

When you register, either at the department store or at specialty shops, you’ll find registry checklists that contain every conceivable item you could possibly need and want. Other couples, due to their unique interests, create a non-traditional registry such as sports equipment, electronics and decorative items. Most couples nowadays register according to their present lifestyle, not according to the dictates of tradition.

Bridal registries are just wish lists. You can choose as many items as you want as long as these are things that will be useful in starting your new home as a married couple. However, the prices of your choices must vary, as your guests may have a wide range of difference in budget. Try and satisfy all budgets with a healthy mix of high and low-end items and plenty of in-betweens.

You and your fiancé, more than anybody else, know the things that you need (and want) to start your new life together. Come up with a list and see if everything can be found in your favorite shopping haven. If not, then by all means, sign up for other bridal registries. You’d be surprised to see the other fabulous finds available out there.

If you’re getting married here in the Philippines but reside or will reside abroad after the wedding, you have the following options:

õ Register with stores from your place of residence which offer online services. Guests can then view items and shop online. You can also manage and update your selections via the internet. Guests can have their gifts shipped to your home, thus avoiding the hassles of going to the store.

õ Register at the various Balikbayan stores or at shops with Filipiniana sections. They will help in packing and shipping the items for you.

õ You may opt to state in the invitation that you will both reside abroad after the wedding. This will give guests a hint to not give you big items or to give you cash gifts instead.

According to wedding etiquette, it is not proper to include bridal registry cards as inserts in the invitations, which most couples do nowadays. It is like inviting your family and friends to get you gifts. If you have a wedding website, subtly post the information, and then include a note which states "Please visit our wedding website www.x&y.com" in your invitations. If you don’t have a website, tell your family members about your bridal registries as some guests ask them for suggestions. Expect that through "word of mouth" your guests will receive the information. Oh, and remember to send them thank you cards after your wedding. They’ll truly appreciate it.

We suggest you sign up 3 to 4 months before the big day. Upon registration, you have to decide on the selection date, which should be before the invitations are sent. Some guests buy their presents early and you don’t want them to approach the store assistant asking for a list that doesn’t exist yet.

Most stores have a bridal registry consultant devoted to the needs and concerns of engaged couples. They would guide you on how to choose among their selection.

If possible, get a written documentation of the policies of each store where you registered to avoid confusion later, especially when it comes to returns.

Ask the bridal registry consultant for benefits you and your guests are entitled to should you decide to register. Some stores offer freebies, special promos and discounts.

Angel Ortiz of the Bridal Network

Please feel free to send in questions you may want to ask on anything about weddings. The PAWP members shall be glad to answer them and, hopefully, be of assistance in the planning and preparation for your very special day. E-mail santos.ria@gmail.com; kittenzapata@gmail.com or pawp2004@yahoo.com.