I’ve been working for the same company for the past five years and have recently made the decision to pursue a different career path. My old employer had provided me with a lot of learning opportunities, but I just felt that it was time for me to move on to a different challenge and a better salary.

However, I must say that there’s a bigger reason for my decision to move on. My immediate boss in the company I used to worked for isn’t exactly the easiest person to get along with. He’s made several bad business decisions and has even managed to shift the blame to his underlings, including me. What’s worse, there have been occasions when he has made inappropriate advances towards me and other female members of the department. One of my former co-workers told me that before I came to the company, seven other women had all quit on the same day because of alleged harassment. I’ve tried reporting this before, but the industry I work in is male-dominated and it seems like my complaints were quietly swept under the rug.

A lot of my friends have told me that I have a moral obligation to at least report to the manager one more time before I leave, just so my replacement would not have to suffer the same things that I did. And while a huge part of me wants to do this, I do want to leave the company on good terms, especially because a character reference from them would make getting another job much easier. Should I risk it anyway and report my boss’ past indiscretions, even if my previous attempts never bore any fruit? -Pamela-

Chico says...

My personal opinion is that there is no wrong choice here. If you decide to report him, you’d be right to do so for the sheer personal satisfaction that you did everything you could to spare other women from suffering the same fate as you did. Whether or not anything happens as a result of it is no longer in your hands. What’s important is on your end, you did what you could. Maybe the results will be immediate, maybe at best you’ve planted the seeds of change. And as for the character reference, keep a copy of your formal complaint in case you get a not-so-glowing review.

As for your 2nd option, which is to just leave everything behind without looking back, I don’t see anything wrong with that either. You already reported this many times in the past. This is not just your fight, you know. You don’t have to be the sole warrior, carrying the cudgels for everyone. This is a fight for everyone - you, everyone before you, and everyone after. You don’t need to feel like you shrank from your responsibilities since you’ve done more than your share.

In the end, do what feels right in your heart. If it will make you feel better to fight on, then go get ‘em. If it feels right to move on as soon and as completely as you can, then pack your bags, leave, and don’t look back and risk turning into a pillar of salt. Okay, maybe not that dramatic, but you get my point.

No bad choice here, so let your heart choose to it’s own content.

Delamar says...

I think if there have been other women who have had similar experiences with sexual harassment from this boss of yours, it wouldn’t be too much of a surprise if you have the same thing to say.

Yes, reporting the harassment is your obligation to yourself most of all, then to the company so that they are without excuse if the s**t hits the fan at a later time and lastly the other women who will come after you. So, yes I would report it. If it were me, I would definitely wait for the character reference before you report your experience with him to your human resources department or who ever it is you have to report to. As I said, if there have been many other reports regarding his inappropriate behavior I am sure that your report will be taken as is.

So, yes, I would wait for the character reference, after all that is about your performance within the company and then report to HRD regarding your boss’ unwelcome sexual advances in the work place.

But in case, you just want out of the company with the least amount of hassle and bad blood between you and your former boss, then leave it be. That is also a possible option. Your obligation is to take care of yourself first and foremost whatever that means for you.

Seeing as this is not the first time and there have been reports by other women previously it means the company knows this already. If they are ever going to do anything about it they would have done already, right? So, if it is just a matter of the company knowing they already do. The question is when are they going to do anything about it.

If your case is the first time then I would definitely say yes report it for sure since the company doesn’t know that there is a problem. But they are aware of it already and they seem to not want to do anything about it. If you report it there is a good chance this will be ignored or swept under the rug. And then what? So, if you were just wanting to get out and to get out cleanly with the least amount of fuss, leaving without saying anything is an option.

I guess the question is what is more important for you? Do you want to just be truthful all the way to the end and live with the consequences whatever they may be, if any? Or do you want to just leave and minimize any kind of backlash?

You can opt to expose your former boss for the louse he is and maybe suffer some sort of retaliation from him. Or, you can also opt to protect yourself from any kind of hassle and protect your career by steering clear of all the talk and leaving it all behind. See what consequences you are able to live with and then take that option.

The only real question is what option can you hold your head up high with. It is very important that you can live with your decision and be proud of them and your motives.