Some, well, not so well meaning. I don’t like calling them the Autism D’s but rather Aut-phobics people who are afraid of the words "autism," "people with autism," or anything to do with autism.

One day I met a lady in a convention I attended last month. She approached me during a coffee break and asked me point blank — "Is autism caused by refrigerator mothers?"

Alas, her concept of autism is very outdated. In the 1960’s, Dr. Leo Kanner coined the term autism and based on his early research, said mothers who were distant and cold to their children produced children with autism. Hence the term "refrigerator mom".

Here are some more instances when people showed their ignorance about autism:

Autism is not contagious, it is not a virus. It is a disability that severely affects communication, behavior and social interaction and not an infectious disease.

"Eh, may kapansanan pala 'yang anak mo, dapat nag-aral nalang 'yan sa special school, hindi dito."

People with autism have a right to education, and to be included in the mainstream schools. If the child has the capacity to achieve, given the right approaches and interventions, a child can adopt the challenges in a regular school or even out-do the so called "normal" children.

A mom with a seven year old boy confessed to me that she has trouble dealing with her son with autism. He is now seven years old and was diagnosed at two years old. Up to now she has trouble saying the word "autism." It’s like a curse word that can’t be spoken. I know of another mom who until now, cannot accept her son as being autistic and he is almost in his 30’s!

Autism is a lifelong disability. Acceptance is the hardest part. Sometimes, it is also life-long. As mothers, we all go through the grieving process of Denial: "It can’t be happening." Anger: "Why me? It’s not fair." Bargaining: "Please….." Depression: "I’m so sad, why bother with anything?" Acceptance: "It’s going to be OK." And then we all go through it all over again and again.

Up to now, even scientists can not agree as to what causes autism. Different organizations fight for different causes: Autism Speaks. It’s time to listen. Autistics Speak. It’s time they listen. Cure Autism Now! Aspies for Freedom. No to cure! Vaccine Injury! It’s not the vaccine, it’s the leaky gut! Ok let’s try the GF/CF Diet then! Or try this latest therapy it might work…..Whew!

Now you know what I mean by life-long. Crying. Hurting. Frustrated. But we don’t stop there. We keep on going, all for the love of our children. Happy Mother’s Day to all "refrigerator moms.’’