(photo by Nelwin Uy)

A destination wedding is one that takes place away from your home. It may be on local or international grounds, consist of 2 or 2,000 guests, and last for an hour, a weekend, or longer. Some couples opt to combine the wedding with the honeymoon, while some choose to hold the reception on their return home. With destination weddings, you can pretty much consider the world your altar and there are no limits to what you can do—wear a sundress on your wedding day, say your vows in the local dialect, and even exit the church via gondola.

Why have a destination wedding?

"I don’t know how a wedding in Manila would feel like but a wedding in Rome was definitely memorable. My friends and family still talk about it three months after and I can’t stop watching my videos on YouTube." – Audra Garcia

There are many advantages to having a destination wedding. First of all, it’s different and personal. Because you’re not restricted to a particular place, you can choose to have a ceremony that’s not only unique but reflects your personalities as well. Audra Garcia shares that the primary reason she and her husband decided on Rome as their wedding destination was because they wanted to have a ceremony that reflected the holiness and solemnity of their union. She says, "St. Peter’s Basilica is the ultimate church for a Catholic. If there’s anything we wanted to remember about our wedding, it would be…how God has blessed it. Also, Rome is my favorite city."

The destination you choose can also tell your own love story, as was the case with Camille Patiño Escobido and Cielo Villegas. Camille, who had a beach wedding in Bataan says, "[My husband] saw me the first time while at a beach party…so having our wedding at the beach was what we truly wanted." On choosing Cebu as the site of her nuptials, Cielo shares, "It is a very memorable place since it’s where [my husband and I] also got engaged."

Having the freedom to choose an entirely new location is just one perk of holding a destination wedding. Another more practical advantage is the opportunity it provides for compromise. Sometimes, when engaged couples come from different parts of the country, it may not seem fair to ask some people to travel and others not to. Having the wedding on a neutral territory gives everyone common ground.

Finally, having a destination wedding gives you extra time to spend with your loved ones as most people try to arrive at least a day early to avoid travel issues and stay longer after the ceremony. For Baguio bride Ria Cauton, this was precisely the reason why she wanted to have a destination wedding, "We really wanted to prolong the celebration and savor the day (in our case, the weekend). We wanted a chance to really get to talk to our guests, for people to mingle and to take a timeout from their busy lives."

Overcoming objections

Cost: "I think it does cost the same wedding wise or even less than a wedding at home or in Manila for that matter." – Amanda Tirol

Though the words ‘destination wedding’ may immediately have you imagining dollar signs above your head, wedding away isn’t really any more expensive than having a regular ceremony at home.

According to Boracay-based wedding planner Amanda Tirol, couples can spend anywhere from around 200,000 to 1.5 million pesos on a destination wedding, depending on its size. A quick poll of brides interviewed by leading magazine Wedding Essentials showed figures falling along this price range which, again, isn’t much different from what many couples would spend if they chose to have a wedding at home. Cielo Villegas relates, "I believe we would have spent more or less the same amount [if we hadn’t had a destination wedding]…but it would not have been as romantic, unique, and special if we had it in the city."

In some cases, the cost for a destination wedding can even be lower as Ria attests, "I think we definitely would have spent a whole lot more if we had the same wedding in Manila." How come?

One reason may be the generally smaller guest lists that destination weddings often have. Another is the savings incurred when the wedding is combined with the honeymoon. Because weddings boost sales for a given location, it’s also relatively easy to find group rates and discounts from resorts and airlines to bring down the cost.

More importantly, having a destination wedding forces couples to be creative and set priorities. Says Amanda, "It’s really [about] planning. If my couples have a budget, we talk about what they do away with and what they really want." Audra advises making a list and separating the necessities from the nice-to-haves or as Cielo puts it, "prioritize and sacrifice." Though this may sound unnecessarily painful, keep in mind that in some cases, less really may be more.

For example, one big expense many of our destination brides decided to scrimp on were decorations since the locations of the weddings in themselves were already impressive. Audra confides, "You don’t have to worry about dressing up the church…because St. Peter’s Basilica [where I got married] is already so nice." When it came to decorating her Shangril-la Mactan venue, Cielo relates that she felt the same way. "We didn’t spend too much on the flowers and styling since the Marquee was already a sight to behold."

A destination wedding can also bring out the generosity of people, as was the case with Camille who was delighted to get a free wedding venue and guesthouses after her aunt arranged the use of several Bataan beach houses as a wedding gift. "We really saved a lot from the gifts we received from our loved ones," enthuses Camille.

Cost-cutting strategies may also be employed. One good example is the use of local suppliers where you’re having your wedding. Amanda stresses that it’s important to find suppliers who can give you good advice. "We sourced everything we could from Baguio," adds Ria, "because that saves us the cost of out-of-town fees, transportation, and lodging." For those planning a wedding abroad, scheduling can also be an important consideration. "We had our wedding in winter, during the off-peak season of tourists in Rome, so the airfare and hotels were not as expensive," says Audra.

Difficulty: "Planning the wedding was really so easy…it was so easy. That’s all I kept thinking." – Ria Cauton

If you don’t have the time or energy to deal with the logistics of planning a wedding away from home, then don’t. Have someone else do the worrying for you.

With local governments looking to boost tourism and resorts and cruise lines searching for ways to lure more clients, wedding away from home has never been easier. Ask around and you’ll find all-inclusive wedding packages that come with customizable arrangements and full-time coordinators familiar with not just foreign (or local) marriage license requirements but also vendors in the area.

Even when you choose to go it alone, the Internet and a little foresight make planning relatively easy. Audra shares "From the time we went to Rome in November 2005, I was already searching the internet about weddings in Rome and the Vatican. I had also touched base with various suppliers so when I got married in November 2007, I had two years worth of information and tips. It was not as stressful as I imagined a local wedding would be. Plus, most of the details were already dictated–an official organist, soprano, photographer, videographer, etc. so there’s really not much planning involved."

Guest Concerns: "Some people said, "Ang layo naman!" and we’d say (half jokingly) "It’s a test of friendship" or "The people really close to us will definitely go..." – Ria Cauton

Having to travel to another place may be a problem for some of your guests who find it inconvenient, time-consuming, or expensive. There are several ways, however, for you to make the experience easier for them.

One way is to include in your save-the-date notes information such as climate, appropriate dress, travel suggestions, a passport reminder, any necessary vaccinations or health considerations, lists of hotels and activities and a schedule of events so your guests don’t have to do extra research. You can also offer to shoulder part of the financial burden of traveling, though this is generally not expected and there are several other ways to cut down on costs for your guests.

If a lot of people are ultimately unable to make it, consider holding a second reception (or the main reception itself) upon your return home. This way, everyone still gets to share in the celebration and no one feels guilty. You can even make the reception echo the destination/theme of your wedding—for example, if you got married in Spain, you can have the reception in a Spanish restaurant—and make it a venue to dole out your pasalubong and share honeymoon pictures with friends.

In some cases, having guests travel to your wedding may not even be a problem. Cielo and Audra recount that both their families and friends were not only "supportive" about their wedding plans, they were "happy and excited" as well. "Maybe it’s because people these days expect something more than the usual run-of-the-mill wedding," Cielo suggests. Ria adds that while a few people jokingly protested the distance, enthusiasm eventually won over. "They were all so excited because a lot of them haven’t gone to Baguio in a while." After all, who doesn’t secretly long for an excuse to go on a vacation?