An imaginary scene from a make-believe movie "The Exorcist" 2009: Young girl Regan twists and turns in mid-air, spewing Latin obscenities and green bile at the same time. Father Damien Karras, already near-dead fighting off the demons possessing the girl with exorcism rites from the Bible, suddenly hears a ring. He reaches from inside his priestly robe, and oh, hallelujah, whips out a genuine Leady "In God We Trust" dual SIM phone!

Sacrilege, you may say, but please, spare us the wrath of God and save us from the fire and brimstone of hell.

Brothers and sisters, have mercy on us. We've just received, from what we believe a dark source, a cellphone in the form of a crucifix.

No, we're not lying! We know it's a sin! But we wonder what some people were thinking when they "created" what we think as a sacrilegious attempt to earn money -- yes, the root of all evils.

We don't know why the Technews boss picked us to write a piece on this crappy (yeah, that's our first, and final, statement) gadget.

Technews ed Art Samaniego, a former seminarian, has in fact refused to make comments on this, so we settled with his Facebook entry about the gadget:

""In God We Trust" Dual SIM phone. Features FM radio, MP3 player, 1.3 mega pix camera, bluetooth and ebook reader. Comes in an aluminum box with "In God We Trust" markings all over it."

So where we got this gadget? We really don't know, but our rich imagination boosts our suspicion that this box just popped out from air (sulphuric air, we might add) and into the Tech lab.

Remind us to remind ArtSam that we need to have this gadget blessed, as well as our office -- ASAP.

After that simple rite, and if the gadget was still intact and not reduced into ashes, we can start to look forward to more holy and fun thoughts.

We could imagine Whoopi Goldberg's Sister Mary Clarence wearing the "In God We Trust" phone while trying to whip the best out of the convent choir.

Just imagine, having a direct line to Heaven! We wonder what God's number would be, and which network will be used.

Bruce Almighty would want this gadget, too. Or the late George Burns would've found good use to this in his "Oh God, You Devil" movie.

Just a thought. What's the best ring tone for this gadget? We bet "Stairway to Heaven" is out of the question, especially the back-masked version.

If you must include a physician in your phonebook, make sure it's a doctor with no hidden cam video that you can play in this gadget. Heaven forbids!

And finally, bless us father for we have sinned. But we're just doing our job!