Ben and Cora Abalos (Photos by Pinggot Zulueta)

"I  don’t think we’re compatible!” quipped the young Benjamin Abalos and left the pretty Corazon de Castro stunned and bewildered in the middle of the dance floor, not knowing that that incident would result in a happy-ever-after love story.

The incident happened during Ben’s despedida party which was organized by his family and friends when he decided to pursue further studies abroad. That time, he had already graduated at the Manuel L. Quezon University Law School, passed the Bar Exam in 1957, and was working as a corporate lawyer at Riverside Mills.

On the day of his despedida, Ben had to come to the rescue of Riverside Mills when it was subjected to a routine search by the Customs Constabulary, which made him forget about his own party.

It was only later when he was on his way home and saw his friends that he remembered about it. To compensate for the faux pas, Ben took them to Metro Garden and Grille, a popular night spot during that time.

One of his friends, Johnny Songco, brought with him three beautiful ladies, the de Castro sisters, namely Yolly, Norma, and Cora.

Inside the club, the attendants welcomed them with leis which were not free. As he reached for his wallet, Ben found out that he had very little money left, so the leis had to be taken back much to his embarrassment. But keen to have a good time, the group still decided to push through with the party.

As the night deepened, the young lawyer invited the girls to dance. He first asked Yolly, the eldest of the de Castro sisters, to dance, only to find out that she was too tall for him. Then, he proceeded to invite Norma but “she was a bit stiff and snobbish,” as Ben puts it.

Like a hawk eyeing his prey, Ben then saw Cora who was only 17, sitting in the corner and acting like a chaperone to her elder sisters. He invited her to dance, thinking he could somehow win Cora over.

But Cora outsmarted him. She evaded Ben’s advances and was determined to keep a comfortable distance while they danced. Exasperated, Ben left Cora in the middle of the dance floor, after telling her that they were mismatched.

The incident was soon forgotten, until Johnny teased Ben about Cora’s “pangungumusta.” It gave him confidence and decided to visit Cora at their house in Lepanto Street in Sampaloc, Manila. He even brought Victoria lace to give to Cora’s mother.

When Ben reached the house, he greeted Cora’s mother, only to receive a “You don’t Madam, Madam me!” retort. Apparently, Cora who was then an education student at the University of Santo Tomas has already intimated to her family about the unfortunate incident.

“Sabi ko sa sarili ko, ‘Naku, Abalos, wala ka ng pag-asa.’ Pero nang paalis na ako ng bahay nila, nakita ko si Cora na nakasilip. So, nabuhayan ulit ako ng loob (I told myself, ‘Abalos, you don’t have a chance anymore.’ But when I was about to leave the house, I saw Cora peeking. It gave me hope.),” shares the former Commission on Election chairman.

Challenged, Ben started spying on Cora who always tended the family’s tore, and persistently asked her to go out with him, which she kept on declining. But Ben proved to be so persistent and witty that he managed to get Cora to say ‘yes’ to his invitation. On December 8, 1959, Ben called her house and told Cora that it was his birthday, though he was truly born in September. 

After their lunch date at D & E along Quezon Boulevard, Ben asked Cora if she could join him to visit a church, and they went to Sto. Domingo Church but it was already closed. Ben decided to take Cora to Welfareville in Madaluyong where the Sacred Heart Church was located.

When they entered the church, Cora kneeled down to pray. Full of mischief, Ben kneeled beside her, held her hands, and prayed out loud, “Lord, please bless our love.” Cora was taken aback, and gave him a quizzical look as if asking “What love?”

Then, they went inside a supermarket where Ben bought some ensaymadas, biscuits, and candies which he distributed to the residents of Boys’ Town and then, later on at the Home for the Aged. Though motivated by his aspiration to help the needy, Ben knew he had earned some “pogi” points with Cora.

Throughout their first date, Ben tried to hold Cora’s hand, but the demure young woman kept on resisting. Again, Ben thought of a plan, a devious plan at that. He asked the help of his nurse-friend who was working at the Mental Hospital, and brought Cora inside the wards where violent patients were confined.

“She was so scared. It was a choice between me and the patients. Syempre, kumapit na siya sa akin. Ako naman, syempre nag-eenjoy ako. (She held on to me. And I was enjoying it.),” enthuses Chairman Abalos, as he is fondly called by his constituents.

On the way back to the church, they stopped near the vicinity of the Boys’ Town, where Ben attempted to steal a kiss from Cora. But Cora warded off his attempt. Unknowingly, some boys were hiding in the bushes and were watching them. Soon, they heard the boys heckling Ben.  “They were shouting ‘Mahina, mahina!’ So, I told Cora, ‘Pagbigyan mo na ako, kahiyaan na ito,’” shares Ben.

When night fell, Cora realized she had been out longer than she was allowed. Ben called Cora’s family to tell them that she was with him and that they just went strolling. But Cora’s father who was a tough Manila policeman answered the phone and threatened Ben for taking his daughter. And the most unexpected thing happened: the two eloped and eventually got married on January 30, 1960.

The couple was blessed with five children, namely Girlie, Mandaluyong Mayor Benhur, Arnold who is a doctor, Jonathan who is a city councilor, and Mary Joy as well as 13 grandchildren.

On being a public servant

He said: When you do something good, it will always come back to you. You can’t satisfy everybody. Somehow, they would say something against you. It is very frustrating that after what you have done, they would still criticize you. So, you just have to take it in stride.

She said: I did not like it because I want a private life, but he was insistent. He finds happiness in helping and talking to people. I saw that, and I became okay with it. I helped out. Until now, I’m helping my son. I have my Kababaihan Kakaiba ng Mandaluyong (KKM). It’s been around for 25 years now.

On being parents

He said: (I always tell my children to) invest in education. Study hard. There is no substitute for education. I am what I am now because of education. And that would be the best that I could bequeath them, an education that would prepare you in the future.

She said: (I wish) for them to be prayerful. They should always pray. They should always love one another, and always be humble.

On fashion

He said: I’m all for comfort. Even if people find me inconspicuous, I feel comfortable with that. 

She said: I don’t mind wearing inexpensive things. It’s in the way you carry them, and how you manage yourself even if you wear cheap finds. You can be glamorous in simple things.